i have a tackometer. not a tachometer...no, this measures tackyness. it goes off often at my work, where i am required to smear lavendar paper all over the damn place because the proffesor i work for loves the color. today, i had to update and choose pieces out of the two very large (lavendar) notebooks that she puts all the email forwards people send her into. she keeps these notebooks so that "when she is old she will have something to read." like one of the forwards said, idle minds attract the devil, and the devil is alzheimers. so yeah, i have to re-do the bulliten boards that she posts forward emails on in the hallway of the math and science building.

here is what i learned today:
-women should be constantly alert for rapists, and if a big van is next to your car in the parking lot, get a security guard to walk you back to your car because vans are for rapists
-we can solve our war on terrorism by sending armed post-menopausal women to afganistan
-there should be a flabby-armed barbie and a hot flash barbie and a mid life crisis barbie who is going out with her aerobics instructor
-everyone has five people who love them and fifteen people who are their friends and two people who would die for them, so send this to 9-14 people and then ...uh... something good will happen